Rainy Season

ビックリドンキー・ハンバーグレストラン
Bukkuri Donkey a Hamburg Steak Resturant
8th June 2014 @ Shinjuku

Hello. I haven't been writing as much as I should be. I'm a little caught up with school recently and I have been forced to do more writing in school this semester. This week is my mid-terms exam and I am totally not prepared so I am freaking out a little.

Recently, I've been listening to a lot of classical music. I have always been fascinated by classical music so I guess I managed to find my way near it thanks to technology. I just think it is really sad that I can't play violin or any of those orchestra instruments. I wish I could though.

Today, I left my house and headed to school a little earlier; About 15 minutes earlier  than the intended time. I opened my tunein radio application on my iphone to listen to my daily dose of classical music. When I was walking on the streets, it played this really beautiful symphony, it sounded a little sad but I like music that are emotional and a little depressing because they sound more fantasy like. For some reason, I felt really calm after that. Perhaps a little too calm because I am still slightly annoyed over some issues last week. Perhaps, this is how "the calm after a storm" quote came about.

The weather is slightly depressing here in Tokyo. It is the rainy season here in Japan, or what they like to call it - "梅雨"(tsuyu). I'm not good with the rain because it makes me sad and I lose my mood to do anything.  Today is one good example whereby I don't feel like seeing anyone or talk to anyone. I went home straight after class today because I just want to hide in my room. On the way out of school, I met my friend, Sam, and I offered to walk back together since she was heading home too. It would be weird of me to just walk off without saying much.

After coming to Japan for one year and getting my visa renewed. I realized something. This is not the place I want to be. I cannot see myself staying here longer than 5 years. All I know is that I want to spend my days in school peacefully and learn as much as I can and get back into to working society with confidence.

What I find really strange is that I cannot imagine myself in the next 10 years. But I can imagine myself when I am 40 or 50 years old, still working but I am happy. Not the richest but I am contented with my life. Now, I am just some angsty young adult still trying to find places where I can fit in.

I should not blabber on and get on with my assignments. I can't wait for this week to be over.


Chisaki